Me Laird's Addition to Surerandomality Issue Vierzehn

Greetings one and all from the North Eastern correspondent, may I start by offering my commiserations to anyone reading this update via WAP in some snowdrift just off the M11 or M25, funnier pictures of southern softies with 4x4's not going far have yet to pass my eyes.

Not a great deal of goings on for the past few weeks, but, unfortunately Monday sees me return to paid employment. I am hopeful, however, that this will be the usual experience of driving/flying to various different cities for meeting which I know nothing about, flirting with young admin pool girls (and failing remarkably) and flashing around my poncy business card and reminding people that I am a SENIOR manager so they should pay due deference. More than likely I will be exposed for a fraud by some young minor manager who thinks that, just because he went to university, had bad acne, got syphilis and is a demon pool player, he is also qualified to pontificate as much as my good self.

My main reason for writing is to raise a note of concern, I feel that Surerandomality Issue Vierzehn is the latest issue of Surerandomality to demonstrate the leanings of the administration to a more moderate line, especially when it comes to drinking and GOING TO THE CINEMA TO SEE GIRLY FILMS, WITH A GIRL!

I have long suspected that Squirrel's extended stay in Manchester has somehow led to the pollution of his mind, I seriously fear that he may be off to join some secular pact intent on bringing down the values of the west (Viva Las Vegas, Window Shopping Amsterdam Style, Herbal Remedies and Worshipping of Mild, Stout, Lager, Bitter etc.) I would not be surprised if the next Surerandomality was entitled Surerandomality Death to the Infidel and sponsored by member countries of OPEC, perhaps Kev plans to join the People's Front of Judea, not the Judean People's Front mind, who are a much more vitriolic bunch all together. So, it is with a heavy heart, that I have to demand that those domiciled with Squirrel do everything in their combined (and recently honed/electrocuted) powers to get some alcohol down the man and get him back to his usual self, I feel he is turning to the dark side and some form of subliminal campaign is imminent to turn the readership of Surerandomality into clean living, non polluted conscientious worker types, I for one am not up for that, I was not born into the aristocracy to stand idly by and watch my fellow man make something of themselves! People fought WARS to prevent us from becoming an efficient, moderate, progressive and enlightened race (German).

(To the tune of If your happy and you know it)
If your public ratings slipping
BOMB IRAQ
If your forces are sat waiting
BOMB IRAQ
If the Oil is getting pricey, the economy is dicey, Saddam's started playing nicey
BOMB IRAQ

I leave you with a wise word......

Confucius say, married woman only last half as long as husbands shift

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