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Hit the Bar Vs KF Soldiers
It was apparent early on that Hit The Bar were going to be struggling for numbers - a 7pm kick off coupled with C0ck Boy still away, Owen's continued apathy towards playing (winning him the BAND PRACTISE BENDER) and new-found talent Pete unable to make it, meant 5 was the most they could hope for. Thankfully, G-Man was back in (although still off work sick, but with a suspiciously healthy glow to his skin), but Nez was stranded in Deansgate. A Schumacheresque performance from Dancing meant Nez was chauffeured pitch-side with minutes to spare, to join up with Squirrel, G-Man and Turkish. The opponents, new boys KF Soldiers were ready and waiting, with a large band of supporters as well. HTB struggled to start and quickly found themselves 3 down, and things got worse when it emerged the band of supporters were in fact KF Soldier's subs. However, HTB eventually found a rhythm and started banging in some goals (with a couple of cracking own goals too) and exposed KF Soldier's lack of Powerleague experience. HTB went into half-time 6-3 to the good. Unfortunately, whereas it was half-time as far as the game was concerned, it was deep into the second half of extra time as far as HTB's legs were concerned. A dismal second half display from HTB saw progressively poor marking, tired shooting and a lack of movement in general (even Nez's jaw muscles were relatively still). Credit to KF Soldier's, they capitalised and took away a 12-8 victory, but they may find it difficult if HTB bring a sub to the return leg.
Squirrel - good game, some smart stops, even a couple of double-saves and kept HTB in with a shout at times. Not his best ever performance, but a lack of other contenders earns him SURERANDOMALITY STARMAN - 7
Dancing - used all his adrenaline up trying to get to the game and arrived at kick off with the fuel warning light already on. Like the rest, played well in the first half but faded faster than a cheap pair of jeans - 6
G-Man - not at his best tonight, was responsible for conceding possession in front of his own goal a couple of times and his shooting wasn't as he would have wanted either. Ran out of steam quicker than a second-hand iron - 6
Turkish - also played well to begin with but progressively found himself stranded up front. Too many chances went begging and too many passes astray. Showed good commitment early on but wore-out faster than the receptionist's toothbrush - 6
Nez - compared to last week, he played like his boots were on the wrong feet. Was explosive in his effort in the first half, and to good effect but also faded fast. Some fitness coaches have suggested smoking a pack of fags on Monday night may not have helped - 6